


"Fuck, it's you."

by ilovecowchop (tikkikwami)



Category: Cow Chop, Cow Chop (youtube group)
Genre: Cow Chop - Freeform, Gen, M/M, ambiguous ending, could be considered shippy, funny one-shot, online best friends to real life friends (hopefully), written as platonic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-09-09 19:03:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8908339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tikkikwami/pseuds/ilovecowchop
Summary: AU: Aleks and James are online best friends. What happens when they meet in real life?[James owns a pet supply shop for some reason. He loves Bark Boxes so I thought it was a cute idea.]Humorous one-shot. Not necessarily romantic.





	

As the door shut, the bell tinkled then went silent. James sighed and closed his eyes, trying to regain his patience and failing. He took his phone from his pocket and opened up his ongoing texts with Aleks.

J: this fucking dude again  
J: just walked into my damn shop  
J: smug ass face, half done tattoos, ugly haircut,  
J: he just walked in here again and tried to return another perfectly good leash  
J: and then wouldn’t explain why  
J: like what the fuck? our leashes are great and basically all the same  
J: he just keeps coming back again and again because apparently what i’ve got isn’t good enough unless it’s been exchanged 10 times  
J: at least he got a green one this time. it’s my favorite color

Although Aleks apparently wasn’t answering, James was happy to vent in the messaging app. He knew Aleks would read every word later and either give him advice or agree to the fact that the customer was a complete idiot. Maybe both.

Owning a pet supply shop was interesting. It was mostly old ladies looking for specialty cat foods and young kids buying toys for their pups. He had a few regulars, though. The most annoying of which he was currently venting about to Aleks. Soon, his phone buzzed with a reply.

A: To be fair, I wouldn’t settle for just any leash either  
A: I return things all the time but for actual reasons  
A: But yeah this guy sounds like an ass  
A: Did you ever catch his name? Ban him from your shop lol

James laughed quietly at the thought. As much as the idea was entertaining, banning one of your regulars isn’t good for business.

J: nah but he’s probably named dick  
J: for obvious reasons

And then another customer walked in, and the phone was put back in his pocket for the rest of his shift.

~

Aleks nodded in time with the music playing from his earbuds as he walked down the sidewalk. It was breezy out and he wished he had brought along a jacket. That didn’t stop him from slowing down to text James, even though it made his trip longer. 

He was on the way home from returning another stupid leash that Mishka hated apparently. Something about the smell, or the pattern, could make her bark at a toy or accessory incessantly until it was replaced with something that suited her better. She was spoiled rotten, but it was worth having her as a companion, so he just dealt with it.

When he finally got to his apartment building, he walked up the stairs to his door. When he arrived, Mishka greeted him happily. Luckily, she appeared to like the leash. It was green.

Settling down on the sofa, he reached for his phone again with a smile. He was spending almost all his time lately texting James. They’d met on a gaming community discord a few weeks back, moved a conversation to DMs, and it had been history since then. Talking every day was nice, but being able to vent about his day, feeling listened to, and laughing with someone meant so much more. Needless to say, they were close friends, and only getting closer. 

And then he came up with an idea.

A: Hey James  
A: Where did you say you lived again?  
J: colorado  
J: why?  
A: Duh, already knew we both live in Colorado  
A: I’m in Littleton. I was wondering if you were close enough to hang out

His heart thudded. The strangest part of an online friendship was when it transitioned into a real life friendship. So many things could go wrong, including that James might be some type of creep or murderer.

J: wtf me too  
J: i mean, i also live in littleton

Aleks stared at the screen in shock. Seriously? After weeks of texting they just found out now that they live in the same town?

~

James reached up to stroke his hair, adjusting his bun slightly. He set his phone down on the table and called Ein over. She waddled up to him, cutely flopping her ears as he pet her. “Ein, do you think I should meet this guy for real?” She whined, tilting her head. She seemed as confused as he felt.

He picked back up his phone.

A: Wow, seriously?  
A: I wasn’t expecting that at all  
J: haha yeah, pretty weird  
A: Coffee tomorrow?  


James swallowed nervously and fiddled with his phone case for a moment before replying.

J: yeah sure  
J: just text me where/when at some point before my shift ends and i'll see you then

He covered his face with his hands. Apparently he was meeting Aleks tomorrow.

~

Aleks texted James the name of a coffee shop down the street from his apartment building. That afternoon he walked down the sidewalk, feeling a few butterflies in his stomach. Nervous? Of course, this guy was technically an internet stranger. Shy? He wasn’t going to consider that. This was basically his best friend. That didn’t explain the light blush on his cheeks. Probably just the wind.

He stepped into the shop and pulled out his phone.

A: I’m wearing a white V-neck and black jeans. See me?

James looked up from his phone to the doorway. And saw his least favorite customer. Dumb hair, half-done tattoos and all. He slapped the table. “ALEKS!” he shouted. 

Aleks jumped, startled. And saw the grumpy pet shop owner from down the street. “Fuck, it’s you.”

**Author's Note:**

> The prompt was "two people who hate each other IRL are unaware that they are best friends online" from http://writing-prompt-s.tumblr.com/
> 
> I wrote these texting styles for James and Aleks just so they would be different from each other. I have no idea how either of them text in real life.
> 
> Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. The people I'm depicting are being treated more like characters and this does not reflect how they act in real life. :)
> 
> I may or may not continue this. Let me know in the comments!


End file.
